The ‘Mobile Boot Room’

Published: December 1st, 2024

This blog is about parents and their siblings . . . . more specifically the mums and dads of young footballers and the relationships formed with their son or daughter going to and from football matches.

Dads can do better . . . .  sorry, that short sentence is aimed at me (as a dad). I have 2 sons. Both of them were very good players. However its difficult to curb the frustration when things have not gone too well in the game that your son / daughter has played in.

Introducing the ‘mobile boot room’ ??
The mobile boot room is the car, the van, the sanctuary where everything football related with our young son / daughter is sorted,  eerr not quite !

Picture the scene, you the player, the mum, the dad have been waiting all week for the game. The game in which Adam or Jenifer (that’s the pretend names of the players) are being driven to the game by mum and dad

Just before I proceed further you may want to know what on earth that red vehicle is in the picture above.

Well, that is a commer cob, virtually identical to the one my dad owned.

That was OUR mobile boot room, where my dad played his part in not only assessing my match performances but delivering his appraisal that nearly always started with a positive and ended with a positive. (why didnt I think of that) !!!

In between he ‘tidied up’ the rough end or poor parts of my game with observations and suggestions – I’m sure I did not appreciate it or in fact realise it at the time.

Oh and by the way the ball in the picture … in the rain it absorbed all the water and by the end of the game it was like kicking a bag of cement  .  .  .

Oh and the lace at the top … OUCH! if you headed it.

Anyway back to the scenario….. ‘Adam’ knows he’s had a poor game and ‘Kevin’ (pretend name for the dad) is waiting in the car for the journey home…… Let’s stop there for a moment.

Adam has already clocked the face of Kevin as he leaves the pitch. He knows he’s in for a gruelling on the way home and at that very second Adam couldn’t give a toss about whether he’s going to be a footballer or not.

In fact he’s already planning a new career as he trudges off the pitch and makes that 100 yd walk to Kevin’s car.

He probably didn’t have his worst game ever, but the impending journey home could very well make him feel that way.

This is not a criticism of the parents method ….. I’ve been there and done it myself but if the main intention is to make Adams game better, then I’m afraid that’s not the way to go about it (as I learned as well).

I am as guilty as any dad for trying to put over parts of my sons game that could do with tidying up. As a parent make no mistake that the damage done from leaving the pitch to returning home can be catastrophic.

Adam will be reliving every kick in that game and the wrong decisions (i don’t like the word ‘mistakes’) he made in the game will probably be the same as you think he made.

Lets approach it in a different manner. I’ve already suggested to start with a positive, so what about this … ” You know Adam I saw something really good in your game today that I hadn’t noticed before”  …. Adams now on the back foot, as he is intrigued to find out what it is.

It could have been his communication, it might have been the positions he took up behind the ball out of possession, it might have been the timing of his tackles or the way he pressed his opponent. Whatever it is, as a dad find it and highlight it.

You have now lifted the shutters up in his mind that a minute ago were firmly down and locked.

You might even find that he responds with ” Yeah but I was disappointed in that back pass that lead to their goal” …. The whole point is the ice is broken, you can both discuss what he may do if the situation happens again and what options he would have or decisions he would or could make.

On that journey home he needs a mate. He and you will be able to offload a lot better in future. He will be keen to make amends in the next game – in fact the game now can’t some soon enough!!

Player and parent relationships are absolutely vital …. correction through positivity will bring huge rewards.

The above paragraphs are dedicated to Syd, my dad, my mentor, my mate.

AL.

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